tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-106948462024-03-12T18:56:53.076-07:00A Day in the Life of Mr. ChingA lifestyle guide for the hip & happening, multi-lingual, nature conservationist, urban planning surfer in youAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13119444047336191887noreply@blogger.comBlogger588125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10694846.post-12317105281589070852012-08-21T06:57:00.002-07:002012-08-21T06:57:34.955-07:00My Final Master's Thesis<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13119444047336191887noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10694846.post-17086119293783005882012-08-14T14:09:00.001-07:002012-08-14T14:09:15.734-07:00Singapore's National Duty<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<br /></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13119444047336191887noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10694846.post-61045208539904093072012-07-23T07:23:00.000-07:002012-07-23T07:23:19.243-07:00Great Friends in Baltimore and DC<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<br /></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13119444047336191887noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10694846.post-28657457142367460112012-07-15T22:05:00.001-07:002012-07-15T22:05:15.000-07:00A Hot Week in the Life<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<br /></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13119444047336191887noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10694846.post-50847274046297125542012-07-08T06:22:00.000-07:002012-07-08T06:22:24.879-07:00Scorching Summer Days in New York<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<br /></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13119444047336191887noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10694846.post-68567742606216823032012-07-03T12:39:00.005-07:002012-07-03T12:39:56.320-07:00My Linked In Map<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<br /></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13119444047336191887noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10694846.post-133362526690304892012-07-01T15:04:00.003-07:002012-07-01T15:04:53.029-07:00Beauty and the Beat - Hilarious!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="480" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/B0Rau01wbeo" width="853"></iframe></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13119444047336191887noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10694846.post-82201425682851721312012-07-01T07:19:00.003-07:002012-07-01T07:19:38.226-07:00The Busy Trap<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span class="timestamp published" style="border: none; color: #a81817; font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; padding: 0px 8px 0px 0px; white-space: nowrap;" title="2012-06-30T03:15:24+00:00"><span class="date" style="color: grey; font-size: 1.1em;">June 30, 2012, <em style="font-style: normal; text-transform: uppercase;">3:15 AM</em></span></span><span class="postMetaHeaderCommentCount commentCount" style="border-left-color: rgb(204, 204, 204); border-left-style: solid; border-left-width: 1px; font-size: 1.1em; padding: 0px 0px 0px 8px;"><a class="commentCountLink icon commentIcon" href="http://opinionator.blogs.nytimes.com/2012/06/30/the-busy-trap/#postComment" style="background-image: url(http://graphics8.nytimes.com/images/icons/multimedia/comment_icon.gif); background-position: 0% 50%; background-repeat: no-repeat no-repeat; color: #666699; font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; padding-left: 13px; text-decoration: none;">45 Comments</a></span></div>
<h1 class="entry-title" style="color: black; font-family: nyt-cheltenham-hinted-1, nyt-cheltenham-hinted-2, georgia, 'times new roman', times, serif; font-size: 25px; font-weight: normal; line-height: 1.083em; margin: 5px 0px 2px;">
The ‘Busy’ Trap</h1>
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By <a class="url fn" href="http://opinionator.blogs.nytimes.com/author/tim-kreider/" style="color: #666699; text-decoration: none; text-transform: uppercase;" title="See all posts by TIM KREIDER">TIM KREIDER</a></address>
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<a href="http://opinionator.blogs.nytimes.com/category/anxiety/" style="color: #666699; text-decoration: none;">Anxiety:</a> We worry. A gallery of contributors count the ways.</div>
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If you live in America in the 21st century you’ve probably had to listen to a lot of people tell you how busy they are. It’s become the default response when you ask anyone how they’re doing: “Busy!” “<em>So</em> busy.” “<em>Crazy</em> busy.” It is, pretty obviously, a boast disguised as a complaint. And the stock response is a kind of congratulation: “That’s a good problem to have,” or “Better than the opposite.”</div>
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It’s not as if any of us wants to live like this; it’s something we collectively force one another to do.<div style="font-size: 1em; line-height: 1.4em;">
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Notice it isn’t generally people pulling back-to-back shifts in the I.C.U. or commuting by bus to three minimum-wage jobs who tell you how busy they are; what those people are is not busy but <em>tired. Exhausted. Dead on their feet</em>. It’s almost always people whose lamented busyness is purely self-imposed: work and obligations they’ve taken on voluntarily, classes and activities they’ve “encouraged” their kids to participate in. They’re busy because of their own ambition or drive or anxiety, because they’re addicted to busyness and dread what they might have to face in its absence.<br /><span id="more-130759"></span><br />Almost everyone I know is busy. They feel anxious and guilty when they aren’t either working or doing something to promote their work. They schedule in time with friends the way students with 4.0 G.P.A.’s make sure to sign up for community service because it looks good on their college applications. I recently wrote a friend to ask if he wanted to do something this week, and he answered that he didn’t have a lot of time but if something was going on to let him know and maybe he could ditch work for a few hours. I wanted to clarify that my question had not been a preliminary heads-up to some future invitation; this<em>was</em> the invitation. But his busyness was like some vast churning noise through which he was shouting out at me, and I gave up trying to shout back over it.</div>
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<img alt="" height="444" id="100000001639272" src="http://graphics8.nytimes.com/images/2012/07/01/opinion/01anxietyimg/01anxietyimg-tmagArticle.jpg" width="592" /><span class="credit" style="color: #909090; display: block; font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 1em; line-height: 1.223em; margin: 2px 0px; text-align: right;">Brecht Vandenbroucke</span><span class="caption" style="color: #666666; display: block; font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 1.1em; line-height: 1.2727em; margin: 3px 2px;"></span></div>
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Even <em>children</em> are busy now, scheduled down to the half-hour with classes and extracurricular activities. They come home at the end of the day as tired as grown-ups. I was a member of the latchkey generation and had three hours of totally unstructured, largely unsupervised time every afternoon, time I used to do everything from surfing the World Book Encyclopedia to making animated films to getting together with friends in the woods to chuck dirt clods directly into one another’s eyes, all of which provided me with important skills and insights that remain valuable to this day. Those free hours became the model for how I wanted to live the rest of my life.</div>
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The present hysteria is not a necessary or inevitable condition of life; it’s something we’ve chosen, if only by our acquiescence to it. Not long ago I Skyped with a friend who was driven out of the city by high rent and now has an artist’s residency in a small town in the south of France. She described herself as happy and relaxed for the first time in years. She still gets her work done, but it doesn’t consume her entire day and brain. She says it feels like college — she has a big circle of friends who all go out to the cafe together every night. She has a boyfriend again. (She once ruefully summarized dating in New York: “Everyone’s too busy and everyone thinks they can do better.”) What she had mistakenly assumed was her personality — driven, cranky, anxious and sad — turned out to be a deformative effect of her environment. It’s not as if any of us wants to live like this, any more than any one person wants to be part of a traffic jam or stadium trampling or the hierarchy of cruelty in high school — it’s something we collectively force one another to do.</div>
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Our frantic days are really just a hedge against emptiness.<div style="font-size: 1em; line-height: 1.4em;">
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Busyness serves as a kind of existential reassurance, a hedge against emptiness; obviously your life cannot possibly be silly or trivial or meaningless if you are so busy, completely booked, in demand every hour of the day. I once knew a woman who interned at a magazine where she wasn’t allowed to take lunch hours out, lest she be urgently needed for some reason. This was an entertainment magazine whose raison d’être was obviated when “menu” buttons appeared on remotes, so it’s hard to see this pretense of indispensability as anything other than a form of institutional self-delusion. More and more people in this country no longer make or do anything tangible; if your job wasn’t performed by a cat or a boa constrictor in a Richard Scarry book I’m not sure I believe it’s necessary. I can’t help but wonder whether all this histrionic exhaustion isn’t a way of covering up the fact that most of what we do doesn’t matter.</div>
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I am not busy. I am the laziest ambitious person I know. Like most writers, I feel like a reprobate who does not deserve to live on any day that I do not write, but I also feel that four or five hours is enough to earn my stay on the planet for one more day. On the best ordinary days of my life, I write in the morning, go for a long bike ride and run errands in the afternoon, and in the evening I see friends, read or watch a movie. This, it seems to me, is a sane and pleasant pace for a day. And if you call me up and ask whether I won’t maybe blow off work and check out the new American Wing at the Met or ogle girls in Central Park or just drink chilled pink minty cocktails all day long, I will say, what time?</div>
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But just in the last few months, I’ve insidiously started, because of professional obligations, to become busy. For the first time I was able to tell people, with a straight face, that I was “too busy” to do this or that thing they wanted me to do. I could see why people enjoy this complaint; it makes you feel important, sought-after and put-upon. Except that I hate actually being busy. Every morning my in-box was full of e-mails asking me to do things I did not want to do or presenting me with problems that I now had to solve. It got more and more intolerable until finally I fled town to the Undisclosed Location from which I’m writing this.</div>
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Here I am largely unmolested by obligations. There is no TV. To check e-mail I have to drive to the library. I go a week at a time without seeing anyone I know. I’ve remembered about buttercups, stink bugs and the stars. I read. And I’m finally getting some real writing done for the first time in months. It’s hard to find anything to say about life without immersing yourself in the world, but it’s also just about impossible to figure out what it might be, or how best to say it, without getting the hell out of it again.</div>
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RELATED</h6>
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<a href="http://opinionator.blogs.nytimes.com/category/anxiety/" style="color: #666699; text-decoration: none;">More From Anxiety</a></h5>
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Read previous contributions to this series.</div>
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Idleness is not just a vacation, an indulgence or a vice; it is as indispensable to the brain as vitamin D is to the body, and deprived of it we suffer a mental affliction as disfiguring as rickets. The space and quiet that idleness provides is a necessary condition for standing back from life and seeing it whole, for making unexpected connections and waiting for the wild summer lightning strikes of inspiration — it is, paradoxically, necessary to getting any work done. “Idle dreaming is often of the essence of what we do,” wrote Thomas Pynchon in his essay on sloth. Archimedes’ “Eureka” in the bath, Newton’s apple, Jekyll & Hyde and the benzene ring: history is full of stories of inspirations that come in idle moments and dreams. It almost makes you wonder whether loafers, goldbricks and no-accounts aren’t responsible for more of the world’s great ideas, inventions and masterpieces than the hardworking.</div>
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“The goal of the future is full unemployment, so we can play. That’s why we have to destroy the present politico-economic system.” This may sound like the pronouncement of some bong-smoking anarchist, but it was actually Arthur C. Clarke, who found time between scuba diving and pinball games to write “Childhood’s End” and think up communications satellites. My old colleague Ted Rall recently wrote a column proposing that we divorce income from work and give each citizen a guaranteed paycheck, which sounds like the kind of lunatic notion that’ll be considered a basic human right in about a century, like abolition, universal suffrage and eight-hour workdays. The Puritans turned work into a virtue, evidently forgetting that God invented it as a punishment.</div>
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Perhaps the world would soon slide to ruin if everyone behaved as I do. But I would suggest that an ideal human life lies somewhere between my own defiant indolence and the rest of the world’s endless frenetic hustle. My role is just to be a bad influence, the kid standing outside the classroom window making faces at you at your desk, urging you to just this once make some excuse and get out of there, come outside and play. My own resolute idleness has mostly been a luxury rather than a virtue, but I did make a conscious decision, a long time ago, to choose time over money, since I’ve always understood that the best investment of my limited time on earth was to spend it with people I love. I suppose it’s possible I’ll lie on my deathbed regretting that I didn’t work harder and say everything I had to say, but I think what I’ll really wish is that I could have one more beer with Chris, another long talk with Megan, one last good hard laugh with Boyd. Life is too short to be busy.</div>
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(<em>Anxiety welcomes submissions at <a href="mailto:anxiety@nytimes.com" style="color: #666699;" target="_blank">anxiety@nytimes.com</a>.</em>)</div>
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<img alt="Author photo" src="http://graphics8.nytimes.com/images/2009/03/30/opinion/kreider.jpg" /></div>
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<em>Tim Kreider is the author of “<a href="http://books.simonandschuster.com/We-Learn-Nothing/Tim-Kreider/9781439198704" style="color: #666699;">We Learn Nothing</a>,” a collection of essays and cartoons. His cartoon, “The Pain — When Will It End?” has been collected in three books by Fantagraphics.</em></div>
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</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13119444047336191887noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10694846.post-73964505977610904152012-06-30T22:05:00.001-07:002012-06-30T22:05:32.307-07:00Whalewatching!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<br /></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13119444047336191887noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10694846.post-66851641324132834792012-06-25T06:51:00.003-07:002012-06-25T06:52:04.588-07:00Sailing with MIT<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<br /></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13119444047336191887noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10694846.post-73638947183391418542012-06-19T20:22:00.001-07:002012-06-19T20:34:58.778-07:00Summer Massachusetts Beautiful<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As the light increased</span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I discovered around me an ocean mist</span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">which by chance reached up to the base of the top</span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">and shut out every vestige of the earth.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">while I was left floating on this fragment</span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">of the wreck of the world,</span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">in my carved plank in cloudland;</span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">a situation which required</span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">no aid from the imagination</span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">to render it impressive</span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Henry David Thoreau</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">To track Muntasir this summer, go to <a href="http://www.trashmaniac.com/">www.trashmaniac.com</a></span></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13119444047336191887noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10694846.post-58542432709940030512012-06-19T13:11:00.002-07:002012-06-19T13:11:48.184-07:00Daily Affirmation<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<tr><td class="index" style="font-family: Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 18px; padding-right: 10px; vertical-align: top; width: 20px;"><a href="http://nice-guy.urbanup.com/1466370" style="color: black; font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none;">1.</a></td><td class="word" style="font-family: Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 18px; font-weight: bold; vertical-align: top;">nice guy</td><td class="tools" id="tools_1466370" style="line-height: 20px; text-align: right; vertical-align: top; white-space: nowrap;"><span class="status"><a href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=nice%20guy#" style="color: black; outline: 0px; text-decoration: none;"><b>3950</b> up</a>, <a href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=nice%20guy#" style="color: black; outline: 0px; text-decoration: none;"><b>603</b> down</a></span><span class="thumbs"><a class="thumbs_down" href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=nice%20guy#" id="thumbs_down_1466370" style="background-image: url(data:image/gif; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: no-repeat no-repeat; color: #6586a7; display: block; float: right; height: 19px; margin-left: 4px; width: 19px;"></a><a class="thumbs_up" href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=nice%20guy#" id="thumbs_up_1466370" style="background-image: url(data:image/gif; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: no-repeat no-repeat; color: #6586a7; display: block; float: right; height: 19px; margin-left: 4px; width: 19px;"></a></span></td></tr>
<tr><td style="vertical-align: top;"></td><td class="text" colspan="2" id="entry_1466370" style="line-height: 1.8; padding-bottom: 10px; padding-right: 15px; vertical-align: top;"><div class="definition">
<br />
A young male who will give up countless hours of his time listening to the problems of his very attractive female friends because they need someone to talk to about their apathetic, Baywatch jock of a boyfriend because no one else will listen or genuinely care. Although always surrounded by beautiful girls the nice guy can’t get a girlfriend or even facilitate the alleviation of certain “drives” because his “ordinary” physical appearance will forever be compared to the Baywatch beach bum’s. The nice guy would never capitalize on a vulnerable girl, objectify or cheat on a girl, he will go out of his way and bend over backwards to help his “friends” and will never ask for anything in return but no matter how intelligent, understanding, humorous, compassionate, trusting or loyal the nice guy is the female cohort will always pass him up and endure any length of abuse, objectification, apathy and cold-heartedness from a man if he has physical attractiveness, fashion, big muscles and chiseled facial features.<br />
<br />
The nice guy will eventually realize that his dependability and empathy will never be appreciated and all his friendships with females are all one-sided. This coupled with years of watching girls go for tanned, muscular jerk-offs with nice cars while he desperately hopes someone will realize that how viable he actually is will spawn and incubate the nice guy’s insecurities and he will eventually abandon his views, dumb-down his speech, take-up weight-lifting and sw...</div>
<div class="example" style="font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 5pt; margin-top: 5pt;">
</div>
<a class="more" href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=nice%20guy&defid=1466370" style="background-color: #5078a1; color: #fbffea; padding: 2px 3px; text-decoration: none;">more...</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/products.php?term=nice%20guy&defid=1466370" style="background-color: #ed6523; color: white; display: inline-block; line-height: 15px; margin-bottom: 3px; padding: 1px 4px; text-decoration: none;"><span class="zazzle_link_text">buy nice guy mugs & shirts</span></a></div>
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<a aria-describedby="ui-tooltip-4" href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=nice%20guy" style="background-color: #6698cb; color: #fbffea; padding: 2px 3px; text-decoration: none;">nice guy</a> <a aria-describedby="ui-tooltip-3" href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=jocks" style="background-color: #6698cb; color: #fbffea; padding: 2px 3px; text-decoration: none;">jocks</a> <a aria-describedby="ui-tooltip-6" href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=idiots" style="background-color: #6698cb; color: #fbffea; padding: 2px 3px; text-decoration: none;">idiots</a> <a href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=suckers" style="background-color: #6698cb; color: #fbffea; padding: 2px 3px; text-decoration: none;">suckers</a> <a href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=i%20really%20can%27t%20think%20of%20anything" style="background-color: #6698cb; color: #fbffea; padding: 2px 3px; text-decoration: none;">i really can't think of anything</a><br />
by <a class="author" href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/author.php?author=desperryado" style="background-color: #6698cb; color: #fbffea; padding: 2px 3px; text-decoration: none;">desperryado</a> <span class="date">Oct 3, 2005 </span><a href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=nice%20guy#" id="share_this_1466370" style="background-color: #6698cb; color: #fbffea; padding: 2px 3px; text-decoration: none;">share this</a> <a href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/video.php?defid=1466370&word=nice+guy" style="background-color: #6698cb; color: #fbffea; padding: 2px 3px; text-decoration: none;">add a video</a></div>
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<tr><td class="index" style="font-family: Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 18px; padding-right: 10px; vertical-align: top; width: 20px;"><a href="http://nice-guy.urbanup.com/511338" style="color: black; font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none;">2.</a></td><td class="word" style="font-family: Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 18px; font-weight: bold; vertical-align: top;">nice guy</td><td class="tools" id="tools_511338" style="line-height: 20px; text-align: right; vertical-align: top; white-space: nowrap;"><span class="status"><a href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=nice%20guy#" style="color: black; outline: 0px; text-decoration: none;"><b>2318</b> up</a>, <a href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=nice%20guy#" style="color: black; outline: 0px; text-decoration: none;"><b>538</b> down</a></span><span class="thumbs"><a class="thumbs_down" href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=nice%20guy#" id="thumbs_down_511338" style="background-image: url(data:image/gif; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: no-repeat no-repeat; color: #6586a7; display: block; float: right; height: 19px; margin-left: 4px; width: 19px;"></a><a class="thumbs_up" href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=nice%20guy#" id="thumbs_up_511338" style="background-image: url(data:image/gif; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: no-repeat no-repeat; color: #6586a7; display: block; float: right; height: 19px; margin-left: 4px; width: 19px;"></a></span></td></tr>
<tr><td style="vertical-align: top;"></td><td class="text" colspan="2" id="entry_511338" style="line-height: 1.8; padding-bottom: 10px; padding-right: 15px; vertical-align: top;"><div class="definition">
A male who can't get a girlfriend, never mind get laid, because he DOESN'T treat women like shit.</div>
<div class="example" style="font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 5pt; margin-top: 5pt;">
Bud is a 21 year old vergin because he's a nice guy.</div>
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<a href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/products.php?term=nice%20guy&defid=511338" style="background-color: #ed6523; color: white; display: inline-block; line-height: 15px; margin-bottom: 3px; padding: 1px 4px; text-decoration: none;"><span class="zazzle_link_text">buy nice guy mugs & shirts</span></a></div>
<div class="greenery" style="color: #83b284; cursor: default; line-height: 1.9em; margin-bottom: 5px;">
by <a class="author" href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/author.php?author=D" style="background-color: #6698cb; color: #fbffea; padding: 2px 3px; text-decoration: none;">D</a> <span class="date">Feb 16, 2004 </span><a href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=nice%20guy#" id="share_this_511338" style="background-color: #6698cb; color: #fbffea; padding: 2px 3px; text-decoration: none;">share this</a> <a href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/video.php?defid=511338&word=nice+guy" style="background-color: #6698cb; color: #fbffea; padding: 2px 3px; text-decoration: none;">add a video</a></div>
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<tr><td class="index" style="font-family: Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 18px; padding-right: 10px; vertical-align: top; width: 20px;"><a href="http://nice-guy.urbanup.com/758121" style="color: black; font-weight: bold; text-decoration: none;">3.</a></td><td class="word" style="font-family: Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 18px; font-weight: bold; vertical-align: top;">nice guy</td><td class="tools" id="tools_758121" style="line-height: 20px; text-align: right; vertical-align: top; white-space: nowrap;"><span class="status"><a href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=nice%20guy#" style="color: black; outline: 0px; text-decoration: none;"><b>1325</b> up</a>, <a href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=nice%20guy#" style="color: black; outline: 0px; text-decoration: none;"><b>329</b> down</a></span><span class="thumbs"><a class="thumbs_down" href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=nice%20guy#" id="thumbs_down_758121" style="background-image: url(data:image/gif; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: no-repeat no-repeat; color: #6586a7; display: block; float: right; height: 19px; margin-left: 4px; width: 19px;"></a><a class="thumbs_up" href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=nice%20guy#" id="thumbs_up_758121" style="background-image: url(data:image/gif; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: no-repeat no-repeat; color: #6586a7; display: block; float: right; height: 19px; margin-left: 4px; width: 19px;"></a></span></td></tr>
<tr><td style="vertical-align: top;"></td><td class="text" colspan="2" id="entry_758121" style="line-height: 1.8; padding-bottom: 10px; padding-right: 15px; vertical-align: top;"><div class="definition">
A man who you can call late at night just because you're looking for someone to talk to. He would never speak ill of anyone, never harm a person unless absolutely necessary, never cheat and is always honest. Will help you move just because you're friends and doesn't ask for favors in return. Isn't sleazy and wouldn't take advantage of a person in a drunken or mourning state.<br />
<br />
Often times, this nice guy doesn't have a girlfriend because women usually go for <a href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=jerk" style="background-color: #6698cb; color: #fbffea; padding: 2px 3px; text-decoration: none;">jerk</a>s and just make friends with the nice guy.</div>
<div class="example" style="font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 5pt; margin-top: 5pt;">
Pity for him, don't you think?</div>
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</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13119444047336191887noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10694846.post-19671664286076010832012-06-14T04:30:00.002-07:002012-06-25T06:50:55.354-07:00A Wild Tennis Evening<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13119444047336191887noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10694846.post-52451817221506189752012-06-13T03:48:00.001-07:002012-06-13T03:49:23.377-07:00Bangalore Auto-Rickshaw Driver Using the Meter<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<pre style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #1a1a1a; line-height: 21px; outline: 0px; padding: 15px; text-align: -webkit-auto; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-line; word-wrap: break-word;"><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">It is truly a deep honor to be here at MIT. Not only did I spend some of the best years of my life here, but it has proven to continue to define my life in countless ways.</span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">Many of you may not remember, but in the late 1990s and early 2000s, many corporations and universities were exploring how they could profit or protect themselves from online education. Then MIT stepped in the mix and launched </span><a href="http://ocw.mit.edu/" style="color: #b1180a; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;" target="_blank">MIT OpenCourseWare</a><span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">. As powerful as the offering had the potential to be, MIT's rationale for it was even more powerful. MIT was implicitly saying that some things are more important than profit or any strategic concerns. Even if it would cost the Institute potential revenues, MIT had the moral clarity to realize that if it could give access to knowledge to people around the world for free, it should and would. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">I was busy working at a startup in San Francisco when the announcement came out in 2001. I had no idea then that my own life-adventure would be so closely linked, but when MIT had announced OpenCourseWare, I never felt prouder or more inspired by where I had gone to school. When others were exploring what was profitable or how to defend their existing offerings or just watched from the sidelines, MIT had the moral clarity and boldness to just do what it thought was right. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">Many universities aspire to teach their students ethics; but nothing is more powerful than when they lead by example. This in no small way inspired what has now become the </span><a href="http://www.khanacademy.org/" style="color: #b1180a; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;" target="_blank">Khan Academy</a><span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">. And now, MIT has once again put principle over profit by spearheading </span><a href="http://edxonline.org/" style="color: #b1180a; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;" target="_blank">edX</a><span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;"> with Harvard. For this and many, many other reasons, I am honored to come here and thank the institution that I love so much for reminding me through its actions what is most important. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">But MIT has also affected me on a more personal level. Many of my very closest friends are alumni. My wife went to MIT. The president of Khan Academy was my freshman year roommate in Next House (Room 343). His wife went to MIT. One of our board members went to MIT. His wife went to MIT. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">Of our many close friends from MIT, 90 percent are married to each other.</span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">Now, I think this many friendships and marriages coming out of one place, as romantic as the Infinite Corridor may be, begs some introspection.</span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">In fact, so extreme is the coupling that I have observed here that I have sometimes suspected that this whole place is just a front for a DARPA-funded human breeding project.</span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">However, there are simpler explanations for all of this MIT-MIT love. The most likely of which is that the admissions office here has a somewhat unhealthy habit of only accepting incredibly attractive people. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">But I think it also goes still deeper than that. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">I always tell people that MIT is the closest thing to being Hogwarts — Harry Potter’s wizarding school — in real life. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">The science and innovation that occurs here looks no different than pure magic to most of the world. The faculty here are the real-world McGonagalls — that’s you President Hockfield — and Dumbledores. There are secret tunnels and passages with strange wonders and creatures around every corner — some of whom may just finish their thesis this decade. The names of history’s great wizards surround us here in Killian Court — from Aristotle to Galileo, Newton to Darwin. They remind us that we have inherited an ancient art. One that, despite being vilified or suppressed by forces of ignorance throughout history, is the prime cause of human progress and well-being. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">Also like Hogwarts, MIT brings young people from around the country and world who are a little bit off-the-charts in their potential for this “magic.” Some come from environments and communities that celebrated their gifts. Others had to actively hide their abilities and passions for fear of being ostracized and ridiculed. Students come to MIT from every religion, every ethnicity. Some from educated, affluent families, others from ones that live at or near poverty. But they — you, we — shared a common passion. Something that made us feel a little different. We sensed that MIT might be a place where there were others like us. Where we could challenge ourselves and develop our craft. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">More than, I believe, any institution, MIT attracts and admits this type of creative raw potential, these young people with unusual gifts, with the desire to and ability to push all of humanity forward. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">And more than any other institution, MIT pushes these incredible young people to realize what they are capable of. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">This is a place where students with perfect SAT scores and genius level IQs can and will fail exams. A place where students who may have been the brightest student in their school, state or country often feel mediocre and stressed. A place where sleep regularly takes a back seat to the intellectual intensity of the curriculum. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">But this intensity is what forges deep bonds, honesty and compassion. You have laughed together, comforted each other, procrastinated together and cried together. You have been with each other at your best and worst moments. Like soldiers who have fought alongside each other, you have shared experiences that the rest of the world may not understand or even comprehend. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">Because of this, whenever you see another MIT graduate the rest of your life, you know that you have a past in common. That you both have secret powers that you often keep hidden from regular view. Regardless of how different your pre-MIT backgrounds may have been, you will feel deeply connected — like people meeting from a long lost village or family or galaxy. You will actively seek other MIT people out. When others talk about an intellectually challenging experience they had or complain about how hard they had to work, you will glance at the other MIT grad in the room and share a quick smirk.</span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">And if you are the preferred gender for each other, then you also might just realize that they have a certain twinkle in the eye. A certain beauty to the tilt of their head when they are deep in thought. Their competence and expertise makes you wonder what type of civilization you could create together. In short, you discover that you find them irresistibly attractive.</span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">So coming here, I really feel like I have come to my roots. That I am surrounded by an incredibly good-looking family that I am deeply connected to and that I care deeply about.</span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">Many of you will soon enter the outside world and be somewhat taken aback. It will be far less efficient, far less fair, far less productive, and far more political than what you may have imagined it to be. There will be pessimism and cynicism everywhere. It is easy to succumb to this, to become cynical or negative yourself. If you do, you with the potential that you have, it would be a loss for yourself and for humanity. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">To fight these forces of negativity, to increase the net positivity in the world, to optimize the happiness of yourself and the people you love, here are some tips and tools that I like to return to. I am not too much older than most of you, so take all of this with a large grain of salt.</span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">Start every morning with a smile — even a forced one — it will make you happier. Replace the words “I have to” with “I get to” in your vocabulary. Smile with your mouth, your eyes, your ears, your face, your body at every living thing you see. Be a source of energy and optimism. Surround yourself with people that make you better. Realize or even rationalize that the grass is truly greener on your side of the fence. Just the belief that it is becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.</span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">View stressful, political interactions as nothing more than a deeply immersive strategy game. One that can be won if you stay focused on what matters most and your emotions and ego are not tied to your argument. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">If you find yourself arguing with someone whom you respect and love, try to surrender your own ego to the shared identity you have with that person. In the heat of an argument, do the opposite of what your pride tells you to do. If you have the self-control, stop talking and give your opponent a random, intense minute-long hug.</span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">Make people feel that you care about them. And here’s, a well, a little secret, the best way to do this is to actually care about them.</span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">Make people feel that you are listening to them. Another little secret, the best way to do this is to actually listen.</span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">When you gain or lose material things, remember how silly they really are. How little they mean relative to your health and relationships.</span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">When you feel stressed, look up at the night sky and ponder the distance to the next star and the age of the universe. Think of all the other stressed sentient creatures from other star systems and galaxies looking out in the vastness of space in wonder and awe and take comfort in your shared experience. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">When you feel overwhelmed, walk alone through the woods and forget your name, your title, your education and view yourself for what you really are — another mammal wondering why it is here but appreciating the fact that your civilization has not as yet been evaporated by a supernova. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">Try to build true empathy. Regardless of your actual spiritual beliefs, it is sometimes helpful to imagine that time is not linear; that in past or future, or I guess parallel life, you literally are, have been or will be every person. That after this life, you will go back in time and be reincarnated as the person you are arguing with, or passing judgment on (and will then have to put up with the current version of you). </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">Remember that real success is maximizing your internally derived happiness. It will not come from external status or money or praise. It will come from a feeling of contribution. A feeling that you are using your gifts in the best way possible. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">Also remember that whom you choose as a life partner is a far more important decision than what career you choose to pursue. If you are lucky enough to have a true equal, someone who fills you with joy and emotional contentment, with whom you have deep shared values, who respects you and loves you for your innate you-ness; no superficial, external failure or conflict can faze you. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">But keep in mind that if you care about someone, but not enough to commit to them, the most selfish thing you can do is not let them move on.</span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">Money is important for the basic necessities, and even luxuries, of life. All of you will be able to buy expensive fruit and go to Sea World whenever you want to. Beyond that, and many of you will go far beyond that, money is a command over resources — including people — and should be viewed as a serious responsibility. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">Like money, status can be a powerful tool. But they can both distort your reality away from true internal groundedness. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">One of my roommates when I was two years out of college, who had formerly been a bit of a track star at MIT, and I had finished watching Chariots of Fire one night at 2 a.m. I told him that it made me feel like running. He simply told me “Don’t waste inspiration.” I reminded him that it is 2 a.m. He said “so what; don’t waste inspiration.” I looked at him for a few seconds and realized that he was dead serious. I jumped off the couch, threw on my running shoes and took to the streets. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">If you ever feel inspired, take action with it. Don’t let anyone tell you why you shouldn’t; at least lace up and give it a try. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">On a similar vain, inertia, pride or fear should never be the reason why you close your mind to opportunity. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">Most of my own life, I thought I had to choose between a safe route and the adventurous. When I was your age, I was a bit skeptical of speeches like this. I thought, sure, the guy at the podium can talk about changing the world, but what about my student loans, what about my family that has worked so hard to get me here. What about all the people who pursued their dreams and failed? Wouldn’t it be selfish of me to give up the secure path for the long shot at the audacious?</span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">I can’t say this to any group of young people, but for those of you graduating today, I believe that you can have both: security and adventure. Bread on the table while taking your shots at the moon. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">We’re at a unique point in history. Where what once required many people spending many years and many millions can now be done by a small group of inspired people from a dorm room, or in my case, a bedroom closet. Ideas can be proven before they need to be committed to. The revolutions of our generation — in business, education, social structure and even politics — are not being catalyzed by generals or politicians, but by highly empowered individuals like yourselves — the wizards of our time so speak — who can see with clarity how the assumptions of previous generations no longer apply. And the revolutions often grow out of nothing more than an intense hobby, an inspired attempt of seeing if things can be rethought a little better.</span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">So go forth with your careers, but leave space for your passions. Remember that you are much, much more than a title or a bank account. You are dancers and poets, inventors and athletes, musicians and innovators. If you give your passions room to breathe, you might find that is all they need to help you move the dial forward for everyone. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">And this isn’t just a commencement speaker trying to make you feel good or take weight off your shoulders. This is another member of your species who knows how badly the world needs you. Who knows that MIT graduates, like a tall person who learns to slouch to not stand out, sometimes undersell who they are, even to themselves. I am, in fact, putting weight on your shoulders because I know how scarce and important a resource you are. </span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">So with all that said, let me leave you with a thought experiment I use to help keep my priorities in check.</span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">Imagine yourself in 50 years. You’re in your early 70s, near the end of your career. You’re sitting on your couch, having just watched the State of the Union holographic address by President Kardashian.</span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">You begin to ponder your life. The career successes, how you’ve been able to provide for your family. You’ll think of all the great moments with your family and friends. But then you start to think about all of the things you wished you had done just a little differently, your regrets. I can guess at what they might be.</span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">Sitting in 2062, you wish that you had spent more time with your children. That you had told your spouse how much you loved them more frequently. That you could have even one more chance to hug your parents and tell them how much you appreciate them before they passed. That you could have smiled more, laughed more, danced more and created more. That you better used the gifts you were given to empower others and make the world better.</span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">Just as you’re thinking this, a genie appears from nowhere and says, “I have been eavesdropping on your regrets. They are valid ones. I can tell you are a good person so I am willing to give you a second chance if you really want one.” You say “Sure” and the genie snaps his fingers.</span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">All of a sudden you find yourself right where you are sitting today. It is June 8, 2012, at Killian Court. You are in your shockingly fit and pain-free 20-something body and begin to realize that it has really happened. You really do have the chance to do it over again. To have the same career successes and deep relationships. But, now you can optimize. You can laugh more, dance more and love more. Your parents are here again so it is your chance to love them like you wished you had done the first time. You can be the source of positivity that you wished you had been the first time around.</span>
<span style="color: #333333; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; white-space: normal;">So now I stand here, once again deeply honored to be here. Excited by what you, the MIT class of 2012 — both undergrads and graduate students — the young wizards of our time — a time like no other in human history — will do with your second chance.</span></span></pre>
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</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13119444047336191887noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10694846.post-34097562416631587842012-06-05T18:41:00.002-07:002012-06-05T18:41:56.652-07:00Zach Morris on the Jimmy Fallon Show!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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